Hot of the Press!

Well, after thinking about this since last summer, and thinking about accommodation, and thinking about offering variety, and thinking networking with like minded folks........its booked!

This is a cabin at the 7 Half Diamond Ranch just the other side of Merritt. It is an amazing spot, with over 800 acres of GPSed trails, massive arena, two lakes (fishing and swimming) a salon, and the sweetest cabins ever. Fully furnished, sleeping 4-6 with decks over looking the fully shaded and treed horse pens....it is custom made for Fun with your Horses!I have two camp dates booked, July 5-8 and August 20 -23, and size will be limited to 4 people giving the maximum attention and ability to really focus in on specific tasks without getting lost in the crowd. As well, I aim to keep it relaxing...with trail time mixed with learning....no burning out allowed!
Everything is included, except you will have to provide and cook your own meals in the fully equipped kitchen, and bbq in the 'Saloon' last night. 5 nights, 4 days.....price not yet confirmed, but approximately $800.00, plus GST
Check out their website www.guestranchbc.com


And for those of you who came and loved last years Dot Ranch Camps....with its soon to be Infamous Swimming Hole.....no worries! I am currently organizing dates for those as well and as always, if you and a couple friends want some serious one on one, small scale fun and horsemanship, custom camps are totally welcome as well. Earlier booking will help me better serve both our needs and woooooo-hoooooo! With this fabulous weather it is so easy to be thinking about summer again!

I will update the website and keep things freshly posted as I firm up the details here.....

Spanish Monday

Monday's are not known for there stellar qualities as a rule. They tend to suffer from a certain lack of enthusiasm and generally rate fairly low on most people's "Favorite Day of the Week' List, so in light of that, felt that it was pretty much my duty to throw some excitement into the most humblest day of the week. Enter......( Ta-da-da da!).......Espada!
Espada is my 7 yr. Andalusian/ Lusitano mare and to say I adore her would be a gross under-statement. Now just glancing at her portrait at the left to us, one could be deceived into thinking she was.....plain. She has been called a few less then glamorous names,but that is part of the beauty of the Lusitano. Just standin' around in the field....well one COULD be forgiven to think they were plain, but under saddle? No- one in their right mind would think to call that fabulous bull-fighter, 'Merlin' plain! And so it goes with Espada. This is a great shot to see her name sake blaze....a perfect sword, and her battle mare heritage is not far from the surface, that's for sure. Fierce, brave, crazy sensitive and expressive, she is pure undiluted Latin passion. Espada couldn't play Poker to save her life (even if she had opossable thumbs)....EVERYTHING is written all over her entire body what she feels and thinks. Just climbing on her back immediately glues a Big Ole Happy grin on my mug....all the flash and dash and skirt-twirling and its like I have a mariachi band following us along.
Does this make her one of the COOLEST ever horses to be with? Well, for me.... Yeah! 'Spady and me have shared a long, long journey together, and she is truly a gift for me. How she has changed my approach to horses and horsemanship is massive, and I credit her with softening me, the value of non-resistance training...for the human, and of course feel, feel, feel.....sigh!
And today was just another chapter opening up, and I am playing with the incredibly sensitive tuning of our relationship and how vastly my body effects hers...I mean I always try to be aware of what I am doing up there, but this! This is a whole other level again! All we were doing was loose reining it along the top property, and I was steering her with my weight and focus, but if I picked up a soft feel, and played around with the muscles in my back, and tiny hip rotations, shifts in weight...everything changed. Its like having a bio-feedback machine that talks to you about atoms....molecules of change and viola! Oh Boy..this is going to be some kind of learning curve again and ups the level of awareness, responsibility, response- ability, subtly, finesse and ohhhhhh yippe! Part of me can't wait for spring now to get going in the ring again, and faster work, but of course, everything happens in its perfect place and time and its winter. Ice and slippery ground forces me to stay slow, feel, absorb and integrate and build gradually, getting it right first, fast later. Oh, ok! It just never really ceases to amaze me who aware our horses are. How perceptive to their environment, what they are interacting with, and how they constantly adjust to every new situation. Their sensitivity is awe inspiring......and I have the nerve to believe it is me doing the training?????????????????

"Orville Wright didn't have a pilot's license." Richard Tate

Lodestar...................

1. a star by which one directs one's course;
   
2. a guiding principle or ideal

The original meaning of lode is "road, way", a path that leads somewhere. Most often we use today's word in reference to a guiding principle

1 archaic : a star that leads or guides;




I thought I would share with you how and why I came up with the name Lodestar..........

I have a dream.

And I have had this dream since I was a child, a baby, really. And in this dream, all I do is horses and art. Everything I have ever written about goals, dreams, 'If I could do Anything", If I won the lottery, everything has always come back to horses and art. Specifically what.....it mattered not. Sometimes I was drawing, sometimes I was training, sometimes I was healing hurt horses, inside and out, sometimes I was sculpting, sometimes I was riding in competitions, circuses, jumping, sliding, cutting, bareback, in battle, flying, sometimes I was painting, sometimes I was teaching, sometimes I was writing.................all I know is horses and art......horses as art.
I have a very worn out photograph taken on a family road trip thru Merritt when I was 10 or so. It was taken overlooking the Douglas Lake Range, and I swore I would some day live there. :) How actually this whole life has evolved into the creation it has is all quite a mystery to me. Sometimes I was certain I was hopelessly off the path, only to find I was not being true and had to face up and answer to myself. I am still fine-tuning the craft of my life and my belief that it really is all entirely possible.

It Is.



As time passes, and I stand here breathing, seeing, feeling and watching my dream come true I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that 3 years ago when I chose Lodestar as my name, it was because I have acquired another dream. One that has become just as insistent to be expressed and demanding in its presence. And that is to help others to NEVER, EVER, EVER give up on their dreams. Stop hiding them from ourselves, and others, letting them wither and gasp for love and light. Some are so lost deep in their people, that they do not even think they have one, but they do. And......we all really, truly do know what that dream is. Deep inside, we do.Every dream is a gift, a guiding Lodestar to our deepest selves, our true natures, our souls.It is also the thing that we are best equipped to do to give back to others with. Years and years ago I saw this quotation and it has become one of my deep beliefs.

" What we are is God's Gift to us. What we become is our Gift to God."

It has become part of my love of my work that I look and listen for peoples Dreams in what they say, do, or not sometimes. Usually it is so clear to me, and I oh so do want to help them believe. Believe they can, Believe they are absolutely perfect to do what it is. Believe anything is possible. Believe in themselves....just BELIEVE. The world is conspiring for us....if we will only just allow it.

I have a very detailed dream actually written down. I have done this a few times, and every time it comes true, but this one is the BIG dream. The no holds barred, no one is looking over my shoulder and saying WHAT!. It is rich, and abundant, daring and full. It is fulfilling and challenging, fun and loving. I want it all, and I want to share it, heal and rejoice with the beauty of life and the crazy, blessed carnival that it is. And I want everyone else to, too. I mean, really..........what have you got to lose?





That's right............................... Everything.

















I would like to dedicate this to one of my biggest teachers.....Skip Mia Bar. Mia led down the path of truth and self respect. She taught me about boundaries and knowing. She allowed me to gain confidence in my dreams and supported me even in her death........... I miss her terribly some days, but her biggest gift of all was how to Let Go.

Thank you, My Mia, my Muse, the guide of my Lodestar............

Emotional Yoga

Today started out weird. You know, one of thooooooosse days! Days when you wonder what you are, what you really know, why the dream means so much, how to make it all make sense and just feeling sorta overwhelmed by it all. You know....one of those days. And so with far to many thoughts spiraling around and around in my noodle, I spend a good chunk of my morning with my new friend, the spade. Now, never underestimate the handiness of a spade when you need to chip half frozen horse poop out of the ice it has become one with and then Mr. Poo Fork is happy to do the scooping once it has become dislodged. Oh! When will it snow again! Winter's not over by a long shot here, and I muse pensively on the fact that I will soon be going through this icy time again.
Happily, this meditative therapy slows the incessant chatter down in my head somewhat as I grab my friends Carson and Gumby out, and prepare them for what I envision to be an interesting, yet promising ride. I think about what I am planning for this ride as I wait for Gumby to soften and lower his head and accept the bit, deciding on who to ride out, and how best to set it up for all of us to win and gain confidence. Hmmmmmmm Ride Gumby out, pony Carson, switch for the return home. Yep, that's the ticket.
There are a few things that could be fairly big tests on this sort of an excursion, so allow me a moment to expand. Both of these horses have had prior tendencies to over-react to higher stress intensity situations, one by bolting, the other by bucking. Ponying someone is a trigger still for Gumby, having to deal with another horse's energy and their pressure that close to him are tough. Also we will be going past a long time fear spot (Land of Horrifying Irrigation Systems). Carson is very, very aware of other horse energy, and this is something for him to be with Gumby's BIG energy and tension, and they do not really know one another real well. So, I feel they are both ready for this test, and I want them to succeed, gain confidence in themselves and what they can handle, and to know, they have to be exposed.
Out they drive we go, Gum walking out at his crazy fast walk, and Carson has to trot to keep up, immediately setting a tone for the ride, and kicking up the tension. We get past the calves, and I keep feeling for Gum, and he keeps feeling back to me for a moment and two, and then he gets gone again. I am trying to keep Carson in position, jockeying the two two horses around, checking back Gumby, pushing Carson out and back again, and feeling myself get wrapped tighter as well as I try to do too much.

I call a halt, exhale and sit.

Gumby, bless his heart, sighs and waits for me to get my head straight, and I realize, that my first obligation is to him. We are connected, I am riding him, and he needs to be my focus and I need to be with him so he can be with me.

Right. Off we go. Now I am feeling him, moving with him instead of trying to control him, just matching him and gently re-guiding his energy, softly being with just him. And that's all it took. Yes, he still got a bit rattled by Carson jogging beside him, but he would settle as I asked, and this is simply an ENORMOUS change. previously He would get tighter and tighter wound, more removed from the human, very disconnected and worried. At the Hwy. I stopped again and ended with a lovely series of blows from Gumby, before I hopped off and switched horses around...on to Carson.
Now Carson up to this point has been fairly tense, jogging along and feeling somewhat removed from what the two of us were doing, so I took my time to connect a bit on the ground, asking him to back a step, and soften his head for me, making sure he stood solidly for mounting. As we set off towards home, I knew he had alot to deal with, Gumby's excess energy fed into him, facing home, 6 horses in the field he has never seen before, and the three dogs crashing down the banks. I can feel his tension; in his skin, through his muscles under me, and in the air around us. So I make sure I am grounded and relaxed, confident in him, and being with him, give a rub and 'line out my friend, lets go home'.................and he does. As we near the field of horses, and his attention goes that way, I softly ask him back, and repeat about five times, he sighs and ignores them. Just being aware and gently redirecting before it goes too far is all it took to have him stay with me and avoid a potential situation. The rest of the way in, he is blowing and carrying his head and neck low, and swinging the reins in a great long walk.
My heart swells with pride in my two boys and the absolutely terrific changes they are making, their strength of confidence and trust in one another we have, and their ability to have their emotional elastics stretched and relax again. This was a big emotional test for all of us today, and I realize now that that is what makes us all stronger and more fit. If we did not have these things that come along and test our wills, our inner resources, our faith and trust in self and what is guiding us, we would never grow, never change, never improve..........

I leave you with one of my favorite quotes........

"We acquire the strength of that which we overcome." Ralph Waldo Emerson

Expectation and the Slippery Slope

'How this week will unfold, who you will become tomorrow - it all boils down to one thing...Expectation. Expectation that's not followed by action is not expectation... it's just hoping; and hoping has never achieved very much.'
Yesterday, Carson and I had a great chance to explore Expectation. We had tacked up and headed down the road, thinking we would climb the canyon, and sneak back up on the sunshine. It had been one of those glorious, bluebird sunny days in Merritt, but down along the river valley, the sun gets shy early, but has the nerve to tease us by hanging out on the bluffs and high sage hills. So, not to be out maneuvered by some silly old sneaky winter sun and steep climbs, away we went. Now the 'Canyon Trail' as it is affectionately called by me is really a misnomer. There is no trail. But with only sage as undergrowth, and wide spaced pines, who needs a trail? Of course, when I tell you that the canyon is caused by the clay eroding away by our infrequent rains, and is one of my all time favorite features of this place I call home, it should tell you that we were climbing clay. And we have had (clay) unseasonably warm weather for a week now, and all the (clay) snow has been melting, freezing, melting and everything (clay) is generally becoming very un-Merritty mucky (clay). So. happily, we begin our ascent, switchbacking to and(clay) fro, pausing to catch let Carson catch his breathe (clay) and we watch Griffin go by, noticing with a vague curiosity that he is oddly sinking (clay) and having a bit of a tough time gaining altitude (clay). Huh. So up we go....and I bail off the topside as Carson begins his slippery decent, and scrambles to keep the proper side upright.....hmmmmmmmm this is interesting. He had halted his downward ooze and was planted, a leg at each corner facing up and staring at me as if to say....'Well...way to go Hot-Shot! Now what?' What indeed! So slide down to him, with really no chance of falling as my feet have somehow managed to accumulate 12 lbs of clay(clay) on each boot, so I am firmly anchored, not to mention barely mobile. I snag up his mecate, give him a rub and assess the situation. Now this is where things start to get cool. He is thinking down, I am thinking up, I mean, we are half way up as well as half way down, and there's sun up there....and better footing in a another 50 ft or so. So. I now have a goal, a planned route and am willing to ask him to trust my judgment again, knowing that if we both do our bit, all will be fine. This is my expectation and I am fully aware that I am asking him to believe in me and vice versa, because if he panics, or chooses his own judgment over mine, it will not turn out as happy. So, I turn, offer a feel a couple times on the line, just getting his nose tipped the right direction and his mind with me and thinking up(she's nuts, but ok....) and then we leap, slip, grunt, slid and make it to somewhat firmer ground and catch our breathe while I plot out the next portion. And so it goes human leading, using all my best judgment and best ground seeking skills, finding a safe way out of the mess I got us into, and horse following, trusting waiting, following every feel infinitesimally carefully, never crowding me, pausing and resting together. with one last big effort, we top out on the ridge, both of us puffing like steam engines, steam rolling off our backs. I give him a big hug and tell he is AMAZING and definitely a good partner. Whew! What a deal! And what a simply beautiful test of a horse. He was brave, trusting, thinking, feeling for me, calm and patient. All those things that we try so hard to achieve in a safe scenario, often never getting a chance to really test our work. Things like this are what can really give a horse confidence in the human, themselves and they learn they can think through difficult situations, and not panic. HA! And we are basking in the late afternoon sun, on top of the world, both of us soaking up the incredible view.( well, ok, I was actually trying to scrape of half a mountainside of clay (clay) of my boots before climbing back on him while enjoying the view.) Of course the dogs made the top in no time and have come back after chasing whatever it is that Great Danes chase on clay banks, and give us a 'what took you so long' and are off again.
And so are we. Carson has a long series of blows, and lines out into a traveling walk, and we explore the top side of the property and on down to the creek which has opened up in the middle, with cracking, thin ice on the edges. Here, my job is to just sit and let him take his time. Have a drink, check it out, test it, and then just casually walk through, ice and all. The rest of the ride is all small ups and downs, through the sage and trees, and the one stony ravine, and back to the road, where I drop down the rope again and woo hoo! I caught Sage! Ok, she managed to get out of the loop before I could dally up, but something tells me that was just as well.......!
Carson today proved to me that he is becoming a Good Using Horse. One that can think in tight situations, stay calm, stay focused, defer to the human and show trust. We had a job to do, a tight spot to get out of, and he came through with flying colors. I am very proud of him, and I think he is proud of himself as well. He certainly gained confidence today, and we both have even higher expectations of we are capable of together........
Funny thing is, I never doubted that we could sort through the sticky situation, that we had all the skills and abilities necessary and it would all turn out just fine. But I guess that's the difference between hope and expectation.

Snow on the Sage

This is Carson, waiting while I take snap shots to send to his mom, with Sage standing in the entrance to his 'Man Cave'.......

I don't know what it is, but Sagebrush is Magical.....the smell is like Stef Catnip....all I want to do is roll around in it and snuggle my nose deep into its velvety branches. It has such a mysterious aura about it, tough as nails, its bark all gnarled and twisted, yet leaves the softest, delicate sage color......and it is everywhere alongside us as Carson, Griffy, Sage and myself head up the trail behind the Ranch. Our destination is alongside the Hwy, and then across, seeing how deep the snow still is up here (hmmmm not that deep). Carson needs some experience with fast, loud traffic, and although infrequent up here on Hwy 8, if we wait long enough, someone is bound to drive by and give us a wave. We're in luck! Two semi's pass us by, and Carson could really give a snort, so we put a little check in that box, and cross over and up to the gravel pit, circle the Excavator (yaaaawn) and GALLOP up the trail....yee-haw! This is what we've been waiting for, and he feels like he is spring loaded and although his head is high at first, after 4 or 5 strides, a rub and pat, he settles into a ground gaining, dog leaving run that leaves both of us breathless and smiling! Oh! Look a new trail that the trail fairies must have put in since I was last up ( either that or things look different in the snow!) so we head up, but it looks all up hill in a big way, so I take a moment and call a board meeting, in which the dogs were dismally uninterested, so that left Carson and I to make a unanimous decision to return down. He picks up the speed a bit, so I think this is a great time to work on a soft feel ( hold until he gives, then release nice and quickly) and lateral moves, all the while feeling for him...looking for such softness that he keeps his mouth quiet, and carry on down on loose rein. We do this pretty much all the way to the gravel pit, and are getting some AMAZING true half passes and are really moving together, step by step...this is VERY cool to both of us, and Carson feels no pressure to preform, just almost enjoying



using his body. It certainly relaxes him, so onward, through the pine trees we go, now down a steep, slippery gully, threading our way through big rocks and dead fall, and both of us searching for the easiest way back up to the plateau...Oh...I see it too Carson! A big buck deer....but swoosh, he's gone and I call the dogs off like some maniacal banshee....(sheesh!) haha! Carson doesn't seem to care, and we wind our way down to the slipwire which is happily open already, across the highway and onto Dot Rd. Now we have great footing and wide dirt track, so re-visit our soft feel and hold for longer now, and over into that nice leg-yield and back, holding the same flexion, going the opposite way in a half pass, loose rein, blow, blow blow. NICE! I drop out my rope for a couple attempts at snubbing onto the dogs, but they got wise to this game months ago, and I satisfy myself by catching wily, invisible white-faces.....Oh they are slippery devils today....I peer around at Carson as it seems to me he is rolling his eyes....;~.
And here we are back home again....I promised Carson a roll in fresh snow, so into the empty pen by my horses for a nice visit and apparently very satisfying roll.
Thanks Little Buddy!
Lunch for me, and oh darn! Another horse to ride............Bliss.

Gift Horse.....

Meet Gumby.....He is Jeanne's (and my!) special boy, Belgium/Mustang and every inch of this gentle, furry creature is pure Feel education. This guy cannot be 'made' to do anything....just try, and see where it would get you....mowed over, flattened, run away with, maimed and/or killed. Dramatic? No, not really. At 8, Gumby was wild for too long to not have huge survival mechanisms in place, and not at all interested in just handing his life over to us humans. His Brother Nash is up here as well now, and he is a completely different kettle of sardines....yep, he is juuuuuuust fine with being looked after, ridden, contained and domestic.
But, not so with Gumby, but happily, he must have acquired very good karma, as Jeanne is infinitely devoted and patient with him, and has allowed Gumby the time, space, resources and opportunity to proceed at his own pace. This is a HUGE lesson that horses operate on their own schedule particularly those who may have experienced any trauma can tell you, trust is not forced to happen, belief in others not just given, independence held on too tightly. Self preservation has built in hyper awareness, sensitivity, high flight drive, massive distrust and complete lack of desire to connect with a human. All of these are innately in our horses, just intensified in 'problem' horses, and certainly take great degrees of feel to even begin explore. Gumby was one of my pivotal horses, where I realized that I absolutely HAD to feel....where he was coming from, where he was thinking of going, how fast he was thinking, why he was thinking the way he was, how was I making him feel, and was it up to him to change, or me? He would not fit into a program or lesson plan, he had to be felt every single step of the way, or no dice. Period.

Well.

(Human step's back, licks and chews thoughtfully.....hmm, NOW what?)
Gumby is one of the reasons I am a 'Feel Queen'. He helped expand my awareness, my desire to become more finely and acutely tuned in, trust in myself, believe in what I felt/observed, and act upon the intuitive nudges and what simply felt 'right' in the moment, slow down! and the power of just being with our horses. Gumby insisted that I go in with an open heart, an open mind and no agenda. I had to be true, firm, flexible, gentle, reserved, soft beyond soft, respectful and clear. Humbling? Totally! Frustrating? Completely! There are days when I still ask for guidance with this horse as my head hits the pillow, days when i think I may have done wrong. But Today, when we end our 11/2 session with him looking like something out of a Dr. Seuss book as we trot around the property scaring the Poop out of all the other horses and he is having a BLAST doing it- just me an' Gumby doing weird and wacky things.....together and I know it and he knows it, and we stand side by side after he is back in his pen with Nash and neither of us wants to leave the other, I know he has blessed me with a treasure that is only beginning to be explored.
Gumby, the Brumby......Thank You.

Not Always Black and White!

I was doing my daily meditation ( aboard Carson and Indy and as it happened) and absorbing the peace and ridiculous beauty of the silent snowfall, I noticed that although everything APPEARED black and white, upon closer observation, it was anything but. Subtle shadings of color tinted the basic outline and muted the tones of so much white, and I (naturally!) couldn't help but apply this metaphor to life / horses . It is all part of slowing down and appreciating the present (it is a gift after all) We humans love to have things presented so clearly, so black and white and easy to discern and follow, rules of what to do when 'x' happens, and the proper order in which to do things. We love to know how to do things in relation to' how we've always done things before', and what the 'rules of the game' are. Hell, we even have penalties if the 'rules' are broken. Not in the natural world! Everything happens right NOW! ( I Love that...RIGHT now, not wrong now)And of course there are rules, but it depends on each individual circumstance as to how the subtleties and shadings of effect are enacted.
I was involved in a mentally challenging question today, that did not involve the horses, but of course (of course!) the horses brought my answer. Yes, it does depend upon the circumstances, the presentation and the particular shades that color the question, but, most of all, it involves.......what do I feel?
Ah! Feel............ and therein lied the answer, just that easy.

The top photo is Lauren's ' Painted Chief Blackbird' who is certainly anything other then Black and White........
Sage and Griffin demonstrating how to mix Black and White in the truck....
Griffin modeling against the horizontal and vertical patterns of his settee , his eclectic mix of bold Black and White Dane Day Wear.

Griffin, proving ( albeit questionably) that everything does go with Black and White! Hahahahahahaha!

" What we have before us are some breathtaking opportunities disguised as insoluble problems." John W. Gardner.